LET THE PLANNING BEGIN - OUTFITTING THE TEAM - His Highness, the Groom

As soon as you get engaged, you are behind schedule on the wedding planning. It doesn’t matter if you set a date or not, there is always something that needed to be done yesterday. And get ready for the ideas and suggestions to come flying in. Everything anyone had, saw, wished, or dreamed of regarding a wedding could now work for you—and you’ll hear all about it.

The morning following the announcement to Christa’s parents, we were awakened to the news that we, I mean she, had an appointment at a bridal store to try on dresses. Welcome to your first day of special-day preparation. Her mom wanted a chance to be a part of dress try-ons. The moms want to be involved, a lot.

As we held to tradition, I was the only one not able to see Christa and was stuck downstairs. Christmas never felt so good. I don’t think I had ever been in a store catering to women where I had nothing to occupy my time. Victoria’s Secret had sexed up mannequins. Bath & Body had good smells, but a bridal shop with no tuxes. I was left with rhinestone tiaras, which, when worn by a solitary gentleman, produced strange looks from other store occupants.

About every fifteen minutes, someone yelled down the latest dress rankings in completely abstract terms (an MOB specialty), so as not to tip me off to any of the details.

“She sort of liked the one she had on before this one. It was essentially white with some design things. What do you think about that?” the MOB asked.

“It sounds like nothing I’ve ever seen before,” I replied.

Eventually, I fled, for momentary relief, to the sensual oasis of a grocery store. So rarely does one seek to smell cheese. I was able to obtain a magazine with some nonbridal subject matter and passed the remaining time in the shop posing as the intellectually curious gentleman with the tiara on.
- Drew Lloyd
From "Will You?" to "I Do.": A Groom's Tale of Survival